Is it just me that gets slightly offended by people assuming you have got it all under control or people comment that you seem to have it perfect?
Because, I’m telling you now that’s literally no one, no matter how it seems or how it is portrayed.
Yes, sometimes my child sleeps through (double touch wood) but sometimes she’s really difficult and we’ve worked really hard on her sleep and had many stressful days/nights.
Yes I breastfed, but along with formula, and not without the pain, sleepless nights, supply issues, breakdowns and I was lucky she took to it well. It’s up to no one but you how you feed your baby, neither is right or wrong and it’s ridiculous that any mother whether breast or bottle feeding, should feel judged and anything less than fucking amazing.
I do messy play and make a lot of homemade food for Marlie because I enjoy it. She also watches a hell of a lot of paw patrol (I mean, this is mainly because it’s Scotts favourite) and eats whatever we can find when we don’t have time.
When people say ‘aw you’re so lucky to have ‘x’. Yes I appreciate I am, but I’ve also worked hard and motivated myself to get where I am. It’s always said with an undertone. There have been things that have fallen right for me and have worked in my favour but it doesn’t mean I’ve not had a struggle behind it or sometimes things haven’t worked out like I’d planned.
I’ve talked before about suffering with my mental health. I know people that haven’t been through it struggle to understand this, but it has nothing to do with what you have, or don’t have, a lot of the time it’s literally a chemical imbalance that makes you feel like nothing or no one can make you happy again. The strength in this is realising that this is not true, and pulling yourself through, to be able to fully appreciate life again.
I guess the message I’m trying to get across is don’t assume people have it all together because you see a small snapshot of their life. Or even if you see more than that of someone’s life, it’s probably very rare that you see them in the middle of the night crying in desperation or punching pillows in frustration. I feel like the assumption of someone having it altogether almost takes away from the struggles they’ve gone through and the absolute strength people sometimes have to have to get themselves looking like that. You can’t see everything. Except maybe if you are with them 24/7. And I’m pretty sure if you asked My husband if I had it altogether he would call you crazy and he doesn’t even know the half of what goes on in my head 🤪
The other side to this is probably that a lot of it comes from my own self doubt. So maybe sometimes I take offence more easily because when things are going well I have an internal monologue of ‘you don’t deserve this’ or ‘something bad will happen because everything is going to well’. Maybe people mean well and I misunderstand because of the anxieties in my own mind. To be honest it’s probably a mixture of the two.
But don’t ever strive to be like anyone else because chances are, they’re striving for something different too.
We all have aspirations, goals and dreams… and when people achieve theirs, the nicest thing to do is to say well done and find genuine happiness for that person, don’t immediately dismiss any struggle they may have had to get there by insinuating they’ve got a perfect life and have had it easy. People are good at hiding the bad days and we all like to show off the better times we have, so you can never know it all. It’s good to dream, and good for you if one day your dreams come true ❤️